The Goodness of the Badness

By: Sue Donim

Don’t let people tell you that everything bad that happens IS GOOD. That’s simply false. Everything bad that happens, happens FOR MY GOOD, but that does not make the actual event good.

For example, when an adult beats a child mercilessly, it’s abuse, and that is never good. However, if that child then grows up and breaks the chain of abuse in his family by becoming the most loving father ever, because of his pain, then he’s used the badness for goodness, yes.

But the badness  he suffered was not good.

If an abused child grows up, and takes his pain to found an organization that promotes gentle parenting, or provides a safe haven for  abused children, then he’s turned badness into goodness.

But the abuse he endured was never – and will never be – defined as goodness.

Losing my mother to a terminal illness at a young age was not happy or good. But living my life with a sense of driven direction to accomplish, because I am so acutely aware that none of us has forever, is good.

I like to wake up early, I don’t like squandering time, and I  truly love accomplishing…because my mother passed away young, and I know that can happen to anyone.

I know it’s not a good idea to procrastinate, that which is meaningful and important, because we must act, while our health is intact. So the sad  tragedy of my mother’s death fueled me to make the most of my life, even on hard days.

Being trapped in an abusive relationship for decades was BAD. I never want to be trapped like that again, as long as I live. Therefore, over time, I have learned how not to  linger in toxic situations; I get out, fast.

That’s good!

I never want to be trapped by anything, even by my own thinking. So I work hard to overcome obstacles, even those in my own mind. Good!

When a child whom you’ve showered with love all but disappears from your life, it’s almost as painful as  other ways of losing a child. And people judge you, so sympathy is scarce. That’s just messed up. BUT! I have learned to seek support from G-d in a way that someone surrounded by love is never forced to do, and this has strengthened me beyond measure. This is very, very good.

My closeness to Hashem is authentic, empowering, and a constant source of comfort.

So while BAD things do happen, a person can always find a way to do good with the experience in one way or another. Bad is not good! But how it spurs you to positive action can be very, very good.

Some people think relaxing is never a good idea. Of course it is! No life should ever be ALL WORK, NO PLAY.

That’s the stuff perpetual grumps are made of. But relaxing has a time and place.

And with the intention of rejuvenating and refreshing yourself, you will choose relaxation options wisely.

I know of families who choose Lakewood Hosts kosher vacation rentals to relax, as a family. Each family member has a chance to enjoy the finer things in life, both privately and with family members. Everyone returns home, feeling like a new person!

Others engage the upscale service of Lakewood Hosts kosher vacation rentals when hosting numerous guests for a family simcha, especially those who’ve traveled a far distance to join the event.

So no matter why you need to vacation, no matter what is going on in your life, allow yourself to experience the pure goodness of a retreat to Lakewood Hosts Kosher Vacation Rentals. Some things can only be described as not just good, but supremely, divinely great!